I hope nobody expects anything in the way of critical analysis this week or a scholarly book review (not that you have ever got these anyway), it is more likely to be demented ramblings as I am beginning to doubt my sanity. Whatever gave me the bright idea to go on holiday while the kitchen was started? Not only do I have to get things organised re this visit to Istanbul, deciding what to take, what to wear, get money changed, get train tickets to airport, dig out my passport, get insurance blah blah blah, but I have to get the kitchen cupboards emptied preparatory to the Great Rip Out of same. This at the end of the week when I have organised the paint, the lighting and the flooring.
After yesterday's brush with bouncing rubber tyres I slept very badly indeed, kept waking up in a muck sweat and it was not until about 3am that I finally went to sleep and then woke up at 9 am feeling like the Wrath of God. Decided to do nothing, but nothing until I went for my now daily walk (sun shining so lovely), bought Sunday paper and then came back and had my breakfast. Then I girded up my loins, metaphorically speaking, and ventured into the unknown territory that was under the sink and on the top shelves of my kitchen. Quite unnerving I can tell you. I had no idea I was so messy and so sluttish. Here is a summing up of what I found:
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Two cans of Mr Muscle oven cleaner. Why? I never clean the oven so why two let alone one? Into the bin
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Two cans of ancient de-froster for the car. Into the bin.
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Four packets of assorted sponges for wiping down surfaces. Ditto pan scourers. I can only assume I had forgotten I had got them so bought some more. Well, they can come off the shopping list for the next six months.
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Six cans of Diet Coke bought for consumption of daughter at Christmas. She never drank them. In the fridge and I will encourage the kitchen fitters to imbibe and see the back of the wretched
things.
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Tin of baking powder with use by date of 2006
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Tin of bicarbonate of soda (heaven knows why I have this) unopened, with a use by date of 2005
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Assorted packets of almonds, cashews and walnuts all with sell by dates of 2004
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Piece de resistance - a packet of gelatine with a use by date of 2002 (this was the earliest artifact I could find).
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Four sets of chopsticks. Why and why four as I very rarely eat Chinese and then use a knife and fork like any sensible person
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Unused bake ware covered in rusty corners. Into bin.
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About 4 dozen 100 watt bulbs which I am very happy to have as the Green Police (ssshh don't tell them) have now forbidden their use. I remember that when getting these I had to buy triple packs with other wattage bulbs so I also have about 4 dozen 40 and 60 watt light bulbs respectively. Sigh.
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Dried up paint brushes totally beyond saving. Into bin.
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Ten screwdrivers of assorted sizes. I am sure these will come in useful one day.
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One hammer - ditto
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One tile cutter - have not tiled for years but am holding onto it.
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Dozens of assorted batteries - all now neat and tidy in a box as these are always needed
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Endless picture hooks minus the tacks that go with them.
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About three dozen of those little white things that go onto flat pack furniture to finish them off. HA! If you ever can finish them off that is. As I have never put a piece of flat pack furniture together in my life, I am at a total loss to explain their presence in my kitchen drawer.
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Several spiders about which I will not speak. The neighbours heard my shrieks...
All the boxes supplied to me by the kitchen company are piled up on my bedroom which now bears a starling resemblance to a local charity shop and this is how it will be for another few weeks until all is sorted and the kitchen finished. I am sure it will be worth it in the end but oh dear, I wish I could just close my eyes and sleep through it all.
Which I am pretty damn sure I will do this afternoon anyway.
Have a lovely weekend everyone says she through gritted teeth...........
