It is Sunday afternoon and my plan today was to sit down and review my reading so far this year, my discoveries and delights at the half way stage (well, a bit over half way but never mind), and stun you with my insightful comments, wit and brilliance, but no go. You will, no doubt, be devastated delighted to hear that this treat will have to wait for another day as I am currently bent over the laptop looking as if I am auditioning for the chorus in Hunchback of Notre Dame, the Musical.
My back, which was paining me yesterday, went into total spasm in the middle of the night and I discovered this when I tried to get out of bed this morning and fell back uttering howls and unable to sit up straight. These spasms occur about every 18 months to 2 years and fall into a familiar pattern: sharp shooting pain involving a lot of wincing, cursing and swearing from me, getting out of bed by the simple expedient of rolling over and falling out on my hands and knees and then climbing inch by inch up the wall; drink a lot of tea and take a lot of painkillers; have hot shower and slosh on foul smelling embrocation on lower back and apply hot water bottle (no visitors allowed during this as not only do I not look a pretty sight, no make up, hair all over the place etc) but I pong something shocking, probably a bit like a Turkish cab driver's jockstrap (not that I really know what this smells like but it sounds goods) and am best left alone.
After writing this, I will put kettle on again, more Ibuprofen and onto the sofa with remote control. I have been loaned a couple of box sets of NCIS, a series I never watched and is a bit naff, but it is all good fun and full of derring do and I can watch four episodes one after the other without having to move. That is all I am interested in at the moment.
So I am now signing off as the ache is getting really bad and if I don't get off this chair soon I shall be unable to move and I will be back tomorrow when I know from experience that things will have loosened up. Perhaps I need a Deluxe Lumbar Hot/Cold Support Brace. A snip at only $50 plus postage (prompt delivery guaranteed).
PS - we have just lost the Test match while I was writing this, but the tail enders gave a tremendous show and two of the so called 'rabbits' had a wicket stand that put on more than the entire first innings total by England. I have been taking part on a cricket forum and while some of the comments can be xenophobic and pretty trenchant, the vast majority of posters are great fun. Somebody has just pointed out that the selectors now have an easy job for the final and deciding test, "sack all the batsmen and appoint eleven bloody bowlers"
He has a point....OK I am off to the sofa.
